This week I uploaded a video talking about eating disorder recovery and opened up about my thoughts and experience. So, today’s blog post will tie in with that as I know that not everyone watches my videos and I want to try and help as many people as possible.
The main point that I want to raise is that recovery from an eating disorder, or just recovery from anything, isn’t a straight road. There are going to be multiple bumps and obstacles to swerve along the way. I’m going to share a bit of advice that I have learned through my own experience.
Back in February I left both my therapist and dietitian. By leaving the healthcare professionals and ED services behind, some may believe that this means you are 100% recovered and that your life will be just as it was before you developed the disorder. Unfortunately, this isn’t the case. Recovery can take years and even then I believe that you never truly rid yourself of the disordered thoughts – they just get easier to push aside and ignore. You have to continue on with recovery on your own which is what I have been doing over the past few months.
2016, for me, has been the best year of my life since my eating problems developed and I am truthfully the happiest I have ever been. However, that doesn’t mean that I don’t have bad days. Despite having had weeks of feeling really good within myself, I have been hit with negative thoughts niggling away in my head yet again. But I’m still feeling pretty damn happy with my life. These thoughts that once would have tore my life apart and consumed me completely are now no longer impacting me as much as they once did. Due to being in a better place mentally I am able to rationalise with myself and focus on other things.
I know everyone says that about pretty much everything, but it get’s easier with time. The longer you fight against the illness and the longer you are in a better place both physically and mentally, the easier it is to push those disordered thoughts away. You’re able to accept that you may be feeling like this right now, but know that it isn’t going to last forever.
If you are having a low period then here are some things that may help. Remember what it felt like and what your life was like when you were restricting yourself. Were you happy? I can 100% guarantee that the answer is no. Then think about what your life is like now. Those moments when you truly feel carefree and happy. Out of the two, which do you want your life to be like? Another thing that I find helps is telling yourself that as long as you are eating when you’re hungry and until you are satisfied then you can do no wrong. Through practice I’ve realised that if I’m craving something and I ignore it then I cannot focus on anything else and I just keep on thinking about it. If I satisfy that craving then I feel 100x better and am able to continue with my day.
Hopefully this helps at least someone. I know it can be hard and it can feel incredibly disheartening to have a low period after a long period of feeling great but there are ways you can deal with those bad days without going backwards.
If there is anything else eating disorder/recovery related that you’d like me to write about then please let me know! I’m always willing to share my own experiences in order to try and help anyone else out there who is in a similar position.